Lessons from my Mother - Part II

Later this week, it will be Mother’s Day, so appropriate that I would think and write about my own mother, and all that I have learned from her. I have learned much more from her than just the joy of cooking. She was and is, first and foremost, a caretaker. I watched her effortlessly raise five children (or so it seemed). She was always our best advocate; our steadfast cheerleader; a rock-solid foundation for bad hairdays (you look fine), failed tests (you’ll do better next time) or lost loves (it’s his loss). I watched her love and care for my father until his much-to-soon dying day. I watched her tenderly care for my grandmother, helping her gracefully through the last stage of her long and fruitful life. She is my role model for being a mother, a wife and a daughter.

And she taught me, by example, how to be a friend. I grew up watching how she has nurtured the many friendships in her life. One in particular stands out -- her childhood friendship with Sally, from Lebanon, Missouri. Sally and my mother were friends for 70+ years. Through thick and thin. Husbands and children. Living together or thousands of miles apart. Vacations, phone calls, letters. It was what I grew up with, and what has no doubt shaped my own wonderful, lifetime friendships. What a legacy those two have left me. What a gift.

So this week, I honor my mother, for the many life lessons she taught me. And I honor her friend Sally. For the two of them have shown me how lifelong friendships transpire over time and how they spice up our lives beyond measure.

Seafood Gumbo
(a spicy dish from Sally Milstead; first tasted on Wolf Bay off the coast of Alabama)

3-4 Tbs. butter
5 Tbs. flour
6 cups water
2.5 lbs. raw shrimp
1 lb. andouille sausage, cooked and sliced
2.5 cups chopped onions
1 bell pepper, diced
2 pkgs. cut frozen okra
5 + bay leaves (depending on size)
2 large cans diced tomatos
1 can tomato paste
5 Tbs. Worcheshire Sauce
1 teas. soy sauce
4-5 shakes Tabasco Sauce
2.5 Tbs. salt
½ Tbs. pepper
½ Tbs. parsley flakes
½ teas. celery seed
½ teas. tarragon, thyme, rosemary and savory
2 lb. lump crab meat

Directions: Steam or grill andouille, slice and set aside. Make roux with butter and flour (and any grease from sausage). Slowly add water. Add all other ingredients, including andouille, and cook slowly for 3 hours. Add crabmeat just before serving.

Serve with rice (or not) and a big loaf of crusty bread.